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     THE GREAT TRAIN WRECK

 


     
   

A: Spring  loaded Trigger pads capped with rubber. Below the pads, a piezo transducer sandwiched between two pieces of plywood, interface into the Alessis D-4. A momentary push-button switch mounted aside the transducer, within the transducers circuit, supposedly prevents false triggering. (also interferes with Earths EMF ) 

B: “Drum Kat”. This thing in and of itself makes no sound. It plugs (midis) into other things that do.  I really wouldn’t trust any drummer that actually knew how to work one of these things.

C: Copper pipe frame

D: Alessis D-4 drum module interfaces between the sampler and the home grown trigger pads (bird killing variety)

E: Wires hastily gobbed together with duct tape

F: Simmons drum pads left over from the late days of disco when keyboard companies were only beginning to dream up lucrative schemes to abuse drummers

G: Birds, tragically killed by the Instruments inadvertent effect on the earths electro-magnetic feild


 

 

The Great Train Wreck is a sample trigger device.

This instrument / system / mess or whatever you want to call it was specifically designed to facilitate the live performance and over done arrangements of Johnny Skilsaw songs. The thing is played with drumsticks but is used to perform complex, layered samples, most of which, sound nothing like drums or percussion. It's comprised of elements purchased at Home Depot & Radio Shack on my wife’s credit card (Still waiting to be reimbursed by the record company) .  Many of the functions of this device could arguably be pulled off by a conventional midi keyboard however the use of drum sticks opens up a different set of rhythmic possibilities.

    – You could think of this whole “System” is kind of like a super deluxo version of one of those toy guitars where you hit different buttons and get barraged by tacky nurf metal riffs.  I’ve developed an extensive sample library which correspond to this layout. I spent some time setting up and tweaking banks upon banks of samples for performance on this thing and its sister “instrument” The Facoctatron. You probably wouldn’t expect beautiful sound sculptures, stride piano, lush string sections, guitar, bass, or feedback to be performed via a contraption like this. Hell, Even I've learned not to get my hopes up too much seeing that it's been sitting in my garage under a plastic table cloth for the last four years ..since the big controversy 

We ran into some serious trouble

Although this instrument sounded & performed brilliantly, we began to receive complaints from environmental groups asserting that "The Great Train Wreak" was having an adverse effect on The Earths electromagnetic field. I was quite skeptical of this until witnessing an entire flock of Canadian Geese crash through the front window of a biker bar we were playing in upstate NY. I started to suspect that magnetite in birds brains could be somehow affected by interference within in the Van Allen Belt directly attributable to the home grown trigger mechanism (patent pending) I felt bad & bowed to the pressure of the protesters. For now the entire system has been temporarily grounded while the safety committee looks into a eco-friendly solution. 

                            

 

 

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